Dumb luck saves two dogs and some tax dollars

Hannawa Falls pets saved after 8 days on island

BOAT RESCUE: Dogs that slipped electric fence are thin, but OK

- Watertown Daily Times headline, Feb. 2

I still want to know why my tax money was spent rescuing two dumb dogs.

- Response to story on Web site posted by "David"

Thanks for asking, David. The answer is pretty simple for anyone who isn’t the ugly hybrid of Scrooge prior to having those nightmares and the Grinch before his heart grew. Most humans are compassionate when it comes to other living things.

The job of rescue teams is to rescue things. They rescue drunken people who fall asleep with a burning cigarette and set the house on fire. They rescue people whose cars spin off of black ice into ditches on the way to accept their induction into the Mensa Hall of Fame.

Local teams rescue St. Lawrence County taxpayers and homeowners who live in Jefferson, Lewis or Franklin counties. They rescue renters. They rescue Canadians. They rescue dogs and cats and horses and cows. And on and on. It is their job to rescue things that need rescuing.

Sometimes tax money funds the rescuers. Sometimes you’ll see volunteer firefighters standing in the street soliciting donations. Funding these groups is done differently from community to community. But not one community keeps these rescuers rescuing by charging by the job. It would be ludricrous to charge on a sliding scale based on how smart or dumb is the thing being rescued.

Wouldn’t the system be a mess if it was in the hands of Mr. David Scrinch? Bill the drunk guy who fell asleep with a cigarette. No charge for the smart guy whose car hit an ice patch. Bill the folks who don’t pay taxes here. Gratis for those who do. Half price for those who don’t own property but indirectly pay taxes through their rent. Charge double for living things with more than two legs. Absolutely charge the Canadians ... and don’t dare forget about the exchange rate.

Bah, humbug, Mr. Scrinch. You’re a mean one, Mr. Scrinch. What you need are some ghosts or little Whos to teach you that compassion sometimes means not having to save your dollar. But since you are so worried about it, Mr. Scrinch, let’s consider the case of Brandie and Brodie specifically for a second.

Members of the rescue team told my reporter that saving those dogs provided them the chance to do necessary training without paying someone to stage a mock event. It saved tax dollars.

Think, too, what might have been if the rescue team told Brandie and Brodie’s owner, “Um, we don’t do dogs.” The owner then trudges into the icy waters on his own to save his pets and ends up in trouble. Suddenly it’s a human fighting for his life and it’s not just a few divers from the rescue team called ... it’s firemen and emergency crews, spending public money faster than a Love Nugget in Nordstrom’s.

The exercise with the two Bs made the rescuers better prepared should they be called to a situation involving a species Mr. Scrinch might think more worthy of compassion – say a dumb little child. Those two dogs might have saved a life in addition to tax dollars.

So, there is your answer, Mr. Scrinch. We saved those dogs because humans are a compassionate breed. It’s all pretty simple. That we saved a few bucks in training costs along the way was just dumb luck. Thank you, Brandie and Brodie.